panicnhysteria: (matt)
[personal profile] panicnhysteria

I think my mum is having emotional affairs with one and maybe two men. there is this man she always greets with hugs and kisses to the cheek, even in front of me. Today I saw him because he needed my help playing the bass in some event. He approaches and asks if I'm available next Sunday, all the while his hand grabbing my mother's hip/waist/lower back area. needless to say, my mother said yes for me but I feel so bad and all kind of negative thoughts right now.

i would be all for supporting my mothers happiness but I do not condone cheating and my parents are still together apparently ok and mum says this guy is her best friend but god damnit i have a bad feeling about all this. i know it might not be my bussiness but i feel betrayed and angry that she is flaunting this on my face. knowing im not going to confront her about it because fuck Im the daughter its not my place to do it.

Date: 2017-02-25 08:23 am (UTC)

From: [identity profile]

I think everyone can greet friends with hugs and kisses. That includes male/male, male/female, female/female friendships, or any other genders. Some people are just more physical than others.

But I also think that if this is worrying you, you CAN talk to your mother about it. Of course this affects you too. And of course you have the right to talk about your concerns with her. You might not like the answer, but it's better than making up worst case senarios in your head and never knowing the truth. You might be worrying over nothing. You might even start to hate your mother over something you think is there, but isn't there in reality.

Please, clear things up and talk to her.

Good luck and hugs.

Date: 2017-02-26 01:51 pm (UTC)

From: [identity profile]
Respondo en español si no te importa. Pufffff no sé ni siquiera por donde empezar, me parece un problema algo complejo :/ lo que dices de los besos, pienso igual que Tamar y, no sé si allí en México es igual, pero aquí en España lo normal es dar dos besos a todo el mundo, así que yo no me preocuparía por eso.

Lo de la cadera... Eso quizá sí pero aún así... :/ No sé, creo que es un tema delicado y no la confrontaría al respecto a no ser que tuvieras pruebas algo más sólidas...

Espero que se resuelva pronto, un abrazo fuerte!
Date: 2017-02-26 09:52 pm (UTC)

From: [identity profile]

Acá en México solo las mujeres muy amistosas son las que saludan pero con un beso a la mejilla (que casi siempre mas bien lo dan al aire), y mi madre no saluda asi a nadie mas que a él, pero bueno.

Tendré que sacar el tema algún día y realmente espero, sin importar la respuesta, que mi madre no piense que desconfío de ella.

Muchas gracias por comentar.

Date: 2017-02-26 09:46 pm (UTC)

From: [identity profile]

I know this, and I understand, but what makes me suspicious is she only acts like that with him. She is really friendly and I'm used to her greeting everyone with words like handsome and sweetheart so I know its just the way she is. The whole hugging and kissing is just with the man so i dont even know.

If I express what I'm thinking and hopefully my theories are wrong, she'll probably feel bad because of me doubting her. I know we'll have to talk but I hope it doesn't end badly.

Thank you so much

Date: 2017-02-27 12:22 pm (UTC)

From: [identity profile]
I don't know how close your relationship with your mother is, but I, as a mother, would always want my kids to talk to me about anything and that would include something like this.

Good luck.


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